I can't for the life of me figure out the square root of 16, let alone the fact that I've reverted to counting on my fingers*. My vocabulary has diminished to only simple verbs and minimal adjectives when conversing, and my discursive skills seem to be comparable to an illiterate six year old - or, rather, an indifferent, untied-Vans-wearing teenager. Needless to say, I haven't written in some time, which I blame largely on an ever so distant mental stimulation.
And that depresses me.
After all, I find great enjoyment inscribing frivolous encounters and revelations. Each day I become inspired by some event, some individual, yet words seem to fail me. I get this grandiose anecdote in my mind with a solid tag-line to boot, but then I start using 'like' in place of subordinating conjunctions and I give up - I totally like just like hypocritically like became my like biggest pet peeve.
Like, like, like.
And I cringe.
Needless to say, I never thought I would miss the monotonous grind of our educational system. I obtain great contentment waking up early to find myself sitting in the back row, neatly sharpened pencil in hand, and an outdoors scene being doodled onto a pad of paper**. Most of all, though, I never realized how much more intelligent I was when being consistently challenged and mentally tested.
It's amazing to think that a lot of our knowledge is fleeting, and unless it's being routinely fed, we begin to lose it.
I wonder just how many months it takes to forget the things we've learned, how many days it takes to forget the things we've felt, and how many minutes it takes to forget the things you've just told me***.
I suppose it's neither here nor there, but I reckon we have to rely on Truth - that there's a season for everything. This just happens to be my season of having a bad case of ineptitude****.
So, whether you're feeling rather dull and commonplace, remember that you probably are.
But that's the beauty of the situation, because even though you may think your contribution to society is few and far between, we have an active God, which is something I daresay admit to forgetting.
All this to say, there is a plan for my life, and this just happens to be a part of it - even if it means I'm a slower-than-usual, surgery-recovering, always tired, sarcastic and stubborn piece of work.
Eventually my brainwaves will start functioning again, that I have no doubt. After all, God knows how much my heart leaps when simply buying school supplies. All it takes is a little faith, and He'll take care of the rest - stupidity and all (I hope).
Cheers to adolescence.
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*Which takes some time, by the way.
**I take notes, too.
***It doesn't help that I have a terrible memory.
****Spell-check helped me on that*****.
*****See what I mean?! Terrible.
